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Julius Votano - Printable Version

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Julius Votano - French_Fri - 25-04-2013

Julius Votano

Age – 28
Race – Mesalian
Gender – Male
Height – 6’8
Weight – 130
Alignment – Neutral/Bad

Appearance – Julius sports a dark red duster cloak most of the time, it has several inside pockets where he keeps various things. He also wears a black undershirt, grey pants, and black boots. Julius has fair skin, blond hair, and blue eyes, so he tends to burn up easily in the sun. He also normally has a rapier sheathed by his side, which has a gold imbune handle.


Personality - Julius has always been one to get what he wanted, and not wait around for it to be handed to him. He will stop at nothing, to get what he wants. This, combined with his proper upbringing, have turned him into quite the character. Normally polite and calm on the outside, he silenty judges, and determines what people are worth to him during interaction. He has also developed a fear of chaos, he enjoys everything he does to be organized and benefitial, especially to him. Thus, he tends to panic in situations of extreme stress.


Personality Traits –

Positive –

-Polite
-Patient
-Intelligent
-(Normally)Calm
-Courteous
-Distinguished (Mannerly)

Neutral –

-(Occasionally) Skittish
-Sarcastic
-Atheist
-Prone to panic in stressed situations

Negative –

-Judgmental
-Greedy
-Vengeful
-Tends to think “His way is the right way”

Skills –

Advanced –
-Politics
-Harpsichord playing / Music Composition

Intermediate –
-Book binding
-Paper crafting


Basic –
-Ink/Quill Crafting
-Rapier combat

Backstory –
Items brought -

- Rapier (With a gold imbune handle)
- Brass pocket watch


Re: [NEW] Julius Votano - TinyTim77 - 26-04-2013




Re: [NEW] Julius Votano - French_Fri - 26-04-2013

Hey Tim, I have edited what I think I needed to, and just have a little explaining to do.

For point number 2, I am fairly certian I explained bit of what they did.

French_Fri Wrote:However, while he enjoyed his victory for now, the “Red Masks” quickly became irritated… they has spent a lot, even lost a few good assassins attempting to thin out Julius’s competition, and they planned on getting their money’s worth.

If you need further explination, I can always edit it further.


Point numbe 4 is a bit difficult to explain in the backstory, as Julius never really had much interaction with anything outside of Venia. It is a fairly protected city, and although he was involved in politics, and even Governor for a little while, he wasn't much effected by it.


Re: [PENDING] Julius Votano - Michelle - 27-04-2013

Hi, French. Tim's going to be more busy than me this weekend, so we've agreed to let me take over from here.

1. Tim was wrong about pocket watches. They're perfectly fine in Mesalia.
<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_watches">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_watches</a><!-- m -->
Your character should be able to have one, and you are able to change it back if you wish. Sorry the inconvenience.
2. Yes, please explain further about the red masks. Your quote doesn’t quite explain why your character wasn’t suspected when a heap of ‘the competition’ died. It needs more fleshing out. Please revise.
3. It’s a slight cop-out to say the character was completely unaffected by the Civil War. There would have been at least some attempted attacks that may have put some pressure on the government, and the red masks would make the most sense realistically if they were Xitians.

4. “The deal that he had to make was in exchange for their help in the election season, he would try to pardon most, if not all of their crimes, perhaps even make them immune to the law.”
“the “Red Masks” quickly became irritated… they has spent a lot, even lost a few good assassins attempting to thin out Julius’s competition, and they planned on getting their money’s worth”
“telling him that he had better pay his dues, or he was going to pay for it with his life”

This is inconsistent, thus unrealistic. If he made a deal to pardon the crimes, then why is money suddenly involved? Please revise.
5. When Julius arranges a secret ship and a task force to take him to the forbidden lands, he’s essentially abandoning his job and the city. Why does everyone (the rest of the government, Julius’ family, the task force, etc) think this is okay? Why isn’t it questioned? Please revise.

6. “He knew he had no way of winning, all of the others were far more popular, and had a far wider range of influence than he, but that wouldn’t stop him, he was prepared to stoop to any means necessary to get what he wanted, even if it was breaking the law.” This seems unmotivated, as nothing mentioned previously in the character’s backstory suggests why Julius would go to such extreme lengths to be governor. You need a clearer justification. Please revise.
7. You also need to demonstrate how your character’s personality has developed throughout his backstory a bit more. This relates slightly to point six. Currently, the backstory explains the skills and the character’s good traits, but it doesn’t really go into how the other aspects of his personality came about. Please elaborate and/or revise.

8. Your character’s personality requires more explicit detail. Your character’s traits conflict with one another (such as being polite, yet sarcastic and judgemental); note that conflicting traits aren’t necessarily bad, because people act differently with different levels and kinds of company. This would be the kind of complexity that staff look for in a character. Thus, as Tim said in his previous post, this character's personality is much better than the ones you've offered previously because it has hinted at complexity. Personally, I’m extremely pleased by this. However, we need to see more than just hinting and potential; in addition to listing traits, try discussing your character’s personality in prose under a new section. Consider how your character acts overall and under certain situations, and also how he can have conflicting character traits. Please revise and/or elaborate.

Overall, this concept deserves cookies. It has potential as an in-depth character, as well as potential for RP - especially with this map, where non-staff character leaders are lacking. It just needs detail, and a few plot fixes. That’s all. Good luck.


Re: [PENDING] Julius Votano - French_Fri - 28-04-2013

Edited, Sorry it took.....2 days.

Something about point 4 you made, I think you confused the words "Spent alot", "Money's worh" and "pay his dues". I was refering to their deal for Julius to pardon them after the election. It wasn't meant to mean money, but that "He had better give us what we asked for, or elsee" Sorry for the confusion.