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+---- Thread: [Approved]Application- Quob (/showthread.php?tid=986)
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[Approved]Application- Quob - Quob - 04-12-2016
Ign: Quob
About You: I'm an avid role player and student, who participates actively in my community as well as in many other online communities.
CHARACTER INFORMATION
Name: Rayna Amberwood
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Appearance: She's 5'8", with a lean muscled body. Her skin is somewhat fair from working under the cover of night, or under the cover of some form of masquerade. Dirty brown knife cut hair hangs over her face. Bright blue eyes shine like the morning sky from underneath dark lashes. A noticeable scar lies just under an eye of hers. Due to childhood wounds, she has a set of disfiguring scars across her chest. She often wears a dark leather tunic and a hood, along with her leather armor.
Personality: Her once joyful and caring nature, hardened over completely due to extreme poverty. No longer the innocent girl she was 16 years ago, she's now cold and calloused. Her caring nature only emerges, when it comes to the poor, and suffering, who she empathizes with. Surrounded by smart mouths, and sweet talkers, her dialect has become cynical and serious. She is often very secretive and quiet about her past, and will avoid any reminiscing of her suffering at all costs. She'll often motivate the meek and quiet introverts, encouraging them to speak out, while on the other hand insulting the cocky fools who are full of themselves, trying to take them down a peg. If she feels belittled by someone, she'll break out into a fit of rage, attacking the person, with few exceptions.She respects hardworking people. Anyone who sits on their butt all day is just another target. Being well accustomed to thievery, robberies, muggings, kidnapping, and blackmail, the only thing off limits to Rayna is senseless killing.
Backstory: Born into wartime as a bastard daughter to a rich merchant, she was poverty-stricken at birth. Aisha Rosewood, struggling to support Rayna, turned to prostitution, renting out her body in order to pay for the child she so dearly loved.
After 5 long years Aisha married a sickly farmer, who happened to be a veteran patron at Aisha's Brothel. She was a rather simple obedient child. The old man, who'd she know to be her new father, would get into drunken fits of rage, lashing out on the small girl. The farmer even forced Rayna to sleep outside in the barn house. Her mother would cry, when bathing her, finding terrible mutilated wounds in terrible unspeakable places. Every night, Aisha would try to distract the old man, with what little charm the mother had left, in order to protect her child. Aisha promised Rayna that the old man would die soon, and the farm would be their's to sell. She promised they would buy a seamstress shop, and could sew little felt dolls, like her mother showed her.
Another year passed; winter was hell. Rayna slept freezing nights in the barn, swaddled in blankets, stuffed with hay. The farmer had nothing to keep himself busy during the day time and abuse became a daily ritual. Aisha and Rayna only held only the satisfaction that'd he'd pass soon.
The snow began to melt, the farmer lay in bed, the flowers began to bloom, and the spring birds sung joyous songs. The farm would soon be theirs. One fateful spring night, the crops were set ablaze. War horns blew, and town bells rang. Rayna sprung awake from the ground and ran outside. The farm house collapsed in on itself in awesome flames, causing an eruption of embers to illuminate the night sky. Rayna ran towards town as volleys of flames were tossed back and forth over head. The volleys slowed, the sun rose, and she finally made it to the village. She sat for days at the doorsteps of the brothel, waiting for her mother to return. No one ever came.
With the civil war ending a year later and no one to care for her, Rayna relied on begging to sate her hunger. After nights, crying hungry in the rain, she found it was much easier to copy the other beggar children's strategy of taking money from the pockets of passed out drunkards. As her and her new companions grew, their hands would no longer fit into the pockets of passerbys unnoticed. Most of the girls already turned to the brothels, but Rayna, with the memories of her mother's past, was much more reluctant to sell her body. Instead she stayed with the young men, all still too dirty and small to find well-payed labor, resorted to petty crime. During the nights, Rayna, with sharp wit would come up with plans to break into mills and steal grain and bread. She developed a methodology to picking warded locks of old cellars and chests, and taught it to her comrades. Her life of crime, lead her to become a competent martial artist, copying techniques from street brawlers, and learning a few moves of her own. If at anytime her and her motley crew got in a situation that turned too hot, they'd hide in the bustling town harbor, with great crowds of fishermen, markets, and sailors.
Rayna wasn't on bad terms with everyone. She provided food to the new generation of beggar children and their families. Sometimes the sailors at the harbor, aided in their esape by "accidentally" running into town guards. Occasionally, she'd revisit the brothel, where her mother's old friends would crowd around her, asking for money and goods. Rayna cared not for them as they turned her away in her time of most need, but looked out for the younger maidens of the brothel, offering them haven from prostitution. During one of these visits, she encountered a young charismatic barman, who took interest in her. Although she was very cautious with her choice of men, she sensed the kindness of truth in him and after much bantering agreed to help her with her semi-honorable cause to help the poor. With his street smarts and her leadership, they created the Amberwood Brotherhood, taking in brawlers and hoodlums to aid their expanse of organized crime.
Only at 22, Rayna was a gang leader, who was decorated with weapons of defeated enemies.The barman turned liftetime companion, sought to retire the gang and take Rayna to the forbidden lands and live life in lawless peace. Rayna was doubtful of change and grew belligerent. Her lover promised he'd be back in 3 months time, with news of the new land. He never came back. Now 23, she disbanded the gang, setting sail to the forbidden lands in hope that she can recover her lost lover, or what's left of him.
Items: Leather armor, short bow, set of daggers, and a felt doll.
Skills: Lock Picking: Apprentice
Pick Pocketing: Apprentice
Martial Arts: Competent
Additional Comments: I say I'm an avid roleplayer, but I'm not experienced with roleplaying communities that are this well organized. Just came across owner's post at the end of a roleplaying server suggestion forum. Thought it'd be cool. Didn't do the app all in one go (Might be choppy. I don't expect it to be perfect.). You guys got some awesome lore going on. I hope mesalia ends up being a fit for me.
RE: [New]Application- Quob - LuckyLeaf - 04-12-2016
Hey there Quob, welcome to the server, I'll be taking a look at your app.
But to be frank, there's isn't anything to fault, except for the skills.
Now, at the moment, Rayna's skillset is rather too high for someone of her age. Now the suggested skillset would be to lower either the lockpicking skill or the martial arts skill, and dropping the knife throwing and short bow skills.
I ask to drop the two skills because currently, there are no explanations as to how Rayna learned her way round a knife and bow, if, however, you'd like to add details in the backstory that explains how Rayna learned these skills, consequently you will also have to lower some of the other skills, which we can get to in the next round if you so choose.
As for the other three, the pickpocketing skill is acceptable, but I'm afraid as both lockpicking and martial arts are rather difficult skills to master, I will have to ask you to drop either one a level. Note that characters that strive for an advanced skill usually don't have time to work on other skills.
So in a nutshell, I suggest your skillset to look something like:
Lockpicking: Advanced/Competent
Pickpocketing: Apprentice
Martial Arts: Apprentice/Competent
Unless you make changes in your backstory that can support the current skillset.
Also, just for the sake of clarification the bit: "After 5 long years Aisha and Rayna married an sickly farmer" means that Aisha was the one married the farmer, right? Unless the farmer also married Rayna, who was 5 at the time.
Well, that's it for now, please bump the thread once you are done editing.
RE: [Pending]Application- Quob - Quob - 04-12-2016
Bump!~
Thanks for checking it out so quickly. Yes ofc Rayna didn't marry the farmer. Sorry for the confusion. In hindsight maybe I could've looked at some of your applications for a frame of reference with the amount of skills in general. All fixed now.
RE: [Pending]Application- Quob - LuckyLeaf - 04-12-2016
Hello again, all's well except you may have confused the necessary changes, in that you forgot to lower either lockpicking or martial arts. The slashes in the previous round meant that you could choose either one of the sets, so either advanced and apprentice for the lockpicking and martial arts respectively, or competent for both. Everything else seems to check out. Bump the thread once again once you make the edits
RE: [Pending]Application- Quob - Quob - 04-12-2016
Sorry. Fixed it.