26-01-2016, 02:21 PM
Khanhie,
Sorry for doing the thing where I don't write again. I'm sure you have a vague idea as to why, you know, what with pa and his silly hat existing in my vicinity now. I actually realise that I missed him. I missed his cooking and the way he gets so confused by me. Don't tell him I said that, though, because it's all I missed about him.
We've… Kind of made up. The first couple of weeks he kept following me around and I just hated it. It was like suddenly I couldn't be myself and have normal interactions with everyone because he was watching and ugh. You know how it is, Khanh. He's our pa but there's so much he doesn't know about us, and it’s like you don't want him to know just in case he doesn't like it. Like the time Mai had the miscarriage. Or me with… I don't know, name literally anything I've done while out here and asked you to keep it a secret.
So everything was tense until it blew up because I suddenly decided to go on this scouting thing. A local chemist wanted some dragon samples because, well. He’s like an extreme version of Tuan. Needs to know everything? It doesn’t matter. That wasn’t why I went. Remember a few letters ago, I talked about this guy who wanted to become an Xitian for this woman he loved? And then that woman died? Well… I hadn’t seen him in a while. I was getting worried, but I figured that he’s the only hunter we have nowadays, he’s probably really busy. But then the Elder mentioned him, and… he’s dying, Khanh. From all the nether he put in himself.
It’s really scary. This might sound stupid but I thought the first person I’d have to deal with dying would be grandma, and that wouldn’t happen for maybe 10 years if we’re lucky. I just… I don’t know. I didn’t know what to do, Khanh, and I still don’t know. But if that wasn’t enough, when I went to see him, he told me he was going to try to feed himself to the dragon. Poison it using all the nether that was poisoning him. Some kind of poetic and heroic way to go out. The Elder was in on it. He didn’t want me to tell anyone. I’m not gonna lie. I cried a lot. I got really mad that he was doing this, that he was keeping it a secret, that I was supposed to keep it secret because… I don’t know. He was asking so much of me. Khanh… this guy has a way of making me feel like I’m a kid. But not in a bad, patronising way. More in an eye-opening way.
So I went for him, I guess. I wanted to be there for him, even if it meant I had to watch him die. I think… dying alone kind of sucks, and I mean physically alone. But I couldn’t tell pa, of course. Not just because it was a secret, but you know. I didn’t want him to know how much I had gotten into while out here, in case he didn’t like it. It’s stupid, right? I’m a grown woman, sort of. I can at least take care of myself, but all he sees is what he wants to see. Lien the wild one. Lien the shallow teen. Lien the deadbeat loser. So there was an argument, a huge one, and I left anyways.
We didn't talk for forever but you know. I saw two-too-many dead bodies (I thought you closed your eyes when you died), and my friend backed out and made it out alive, but it was too too too close. That whole thing, I'm not dealing with it well Khanh. And everyone is noticing, even him. It kinda stinks because I came here so everyone would stop talking about what a mess I am but it's inescapable, I guess. So one morning I woke up really early and just couldn't sleep again so I stepped out to watch the sunrise and work on some tunes. And he followed me, Khanh. We talked for hours and somehow we didn't scream at each other. I told him that thing about how he only sees what he wants, and I told him all the stuff I told you that I asked you not to tell anyone. Fuck, I even talked about my love-life for a bit. I think it was a real eye-opener for him, but I think it worked out.
That’s not to say I didn’t learn anything about him, either. Did you know grandma on his side killed herself? And that’s why Loan and the others had to raise him? Which is why you and Tuan had to raise me? Because they all thought, hey, siblings can raise each other ok, so let’s leave it to them. It weirds me out that you know, Pa has been our pa for forever, but I didn’t know about this.
So there you go. Two pages of writing to make up for not writing. Including the story of how I made up with pa. But not including how I used a stink bomb on a dragon. Or how the town doctor slapped me. Just kidding, I included some pictures because I got lazy. You know how they say, a picture is worth a thousand words?
*The next few pages are some hand-drawn doodles depicting the previously mentioned events. The quality is amatuer with stick figures and arrows explaining what things are supposed to be.*
Love,
Lien
Sorry for doing the thing where I don't write again. I'm sure you have a vague idea as to why, you know, what with pa and his silly hat existing in my vicinity now. I actually realise that I missed him. I missed his cooking and the way he gets so confused by me. Don't tell him I said that, though, because it's all I missed about him.
We've… Kind of made up. The first couple of weeks he kept following me around and I just hated it. It was like suddenly I couldn't be myself and have normal interactions with everyone because he was watching and ugh. You know how it is, Khanh. He's our pa but there's so much he doesn't know about us, and it’s like you don't want him to know just in case he doesn't like it. Like the time Mai had the miscarriage. Or me with… I don't know, name literally anything I've done while out here and asked you to keep it a secret.
So everything was tense until it blew up because I suddenly decided to go on this scouting thing. A local chemist wanted some dragon samples because, well. He’s like an extreme version of Tuan. Needs to know everything? It doesn’t matter. That wasn’t why I went. Remember a few letters ago, I talked about this guy who wanted to become an Xitian for this woman he loved? And then that woman died? Well… I hadn’t seen him in a while. I was getting worried, but I figured that he’s the only hunter we have nowadays, he’s probably really busy. But then the Elder mentioned him, and… he’s dying, Khanh. From all the nether he put in himself.
It’s really scary. This might sound stupid but I thought the first person I’d have to deal with dying would be grandma, and that wouldn’t happen for maybe 10 years if we’re lucky. I just… I don’t know. I didn’t know what to do, Khanh, and I still don’t know. But if that wasn’t enough, when I went to see him, he told me he was going to try to feed himself to the dragon. Poison it using all the nether that was poisoning him. Some kind of poetic and heroic way to go out. The Elder was in on it. He didn’t want me to tell anyone. I’m not gonna lie. I cried a lot. I got really mad that he was doing this, that he was keeping it a secret, that I was supposed to keep it secret because… I don’t know. He was asking so much of me. Khanh… this guy has a way of making me feel like I’m a kid. But not in a bad, patronising way. More in an eye-opening way.
So I went for him, I guess. I wanted to be there for him, even if it meant I had to watch him die. I think… dying alone kind of sucks, and I mean physically alone. But I couldn’t tell pa, of course. Not just because it was a secret, but you know. I didn’t want him to know how much I had gotten into while out here, in case he didn’t like it. It’s stupid, right? I’m a grown woman, sort of. I can at least take care of myself, but all he sees is what he wants to see. Lien the wild one. Lien the shallow teen. Lien the deadbeat loser. So there was an argument, a huge one, and I left anyways.
We didn't talk for forever but you know. I saw two-too-many dead bodies (I thought you closed your eyes when you died), and my friend backed out and made it out alive, but it was too too too close. That whole thing, I'm not dealing with it well Khanh. And everyone is noticing, even him. It kinda stinks because I came here so everyone would stop talking about what a mess I am but it's inescapable, I guess. So one morning I woke up really early and just couldn't sleep again so I stepped out to watch the sunrise and work on some tunes. And he followed me, Khanh. We talked for hours and somehow we didn't scream at each other. I told him that thing about how he only sees what he wants, and I told him all the stuff I told you that I asked you not to tell anyone. Fuck, I even talked about my love-life for a bit. I think it was a real eye-opener for him, but I think it worked out.
That’s not to say I didn’t learn anything about him, either. Did you know grandma on his side killed herself? And that’s why Loan and the others had to raise him? Which is why you and Tuan had to raise me? Because they all thought, hey, siblings can raise each other ok, so let’s leave it to them. It weirds me out that you know, Pa has been our pa for forever, but I didn’t know about this.
So there you go. Two pages of writing to make up for not writing. Including the story of how I made up with pa. But not including how I used a stink bomb on a dragon. Or how the town doctor slapped me. Just kidding, I included some pictures because I got lazy. You know how they say, a picture is worth a thousand words?
*The next few pages are some hand-drawn doodles depicting the previously mentioned events. The quality is amatuer with stick figures and arrows explaining what things are supposed to be.*
Love,
Lien