[Michelle]

1. Combat issues: these relate to the part where Seven killed the bandits. The overall issue is that this fight is too one-sided to be realistically balanced -- Seven comes out without a scratch, and no one acts against him.

• a) Darkness is for everyone. How come Seven can see in the dark enough to identify and attack the bandits, but they can’t do the same for him? Please revise/clarify.
  b) Seven covers a lot of ground while everyone else struggles to get their footing; either he’s implausibly quick, or everyone is implausibly slow to act. Please revise.
  c) Furthermore, why does no one defend themselves? This is linked with the above point. Seven kills all five of these people, and nothing suggests that they struggle, cry out, or fight back. These bandits are likely to be physically stronger than Seven, so even if they were disarmed, the fight should be more balanced. Please revise.

2. “Novice Husbandry - From his brief time at the farm.” Please specify what it is about Seven’s skill that makes it novice. Is he limited to certain animals? Or can he only do basic feeding and stall cleaning?
3. While the epilogue added new information to Seven’s backstory, it wasn’t quite what staff were asking for. We know plenty about the Dark Hand and what they did to children in general, and why they did what they did, etc, but we don’t know much about what Seven himself did specifically, and how it all impacted him. What we were asking for was basically a new section with the same backstory, but in a more standard format: third person, omnipresent view that’s mostly explicit information. Essentially, what this should focus on is how Seven became who he is. How did he come out of everything with such an innocent personality? Please revise/add this new section.