[FireDog]

Updated backstory, personality and skills.

For the record, I'd honestly prefer you give me all the feedback possible, rather then little bits at a time.

"We need to get to that first." I don't like that. Please get to it all at once.

While I understand that you'd prefer me to grade everything at once, my personal way of grading applications does not follow that. I do this to make it easier for myself to organize and work with.

Skills:

Your character still has too many job skills, even at novice level, to learn within the short amount of time.

Blacksmithing, Cooking, horse care, sewing and construction are all under that category.

Note, horse care and horse riding should be two different skills. Horse care counting as another job skill.

On top of this, the combat and medicine skills are too much with the plethora of skills. Medicine and weapon skills are the MOST difficult to learn, meaning they take more time than the average skill to properly get a grasp of.

You're going to have to remove some skills. Please revise.