[Hutchy]

[dir=ltr]Hello, Graf. I'm Hutchy and I'll be helping you through whitelisting.

• Your backstory needs more relation to the setting’s lore, which can be found here. There needs to be some relation to the lore to help us see how and why this character fits into the setting. What impact did the Civil War have on her home, her family? Does her family bear a grudge because of the slavery? Please elaborate on this.

[/dir] [dir=ltr]

• Your character’s backstory doesn't do a lot to explain personal growth over her life. The backstory needs to show more description of how she was as a child, how she was through adolescence and then into adulthood. It is necessary that we see how the character has changed over the years before arriving in the setting. Please work on this. If you’re having trouble writing this, the Character Sheets forum is a good place to start.

[/dir] [dir=ltr]

• On your skills section, you seem to have put a level next to categories of skills. You don't need to do this. For instance, the skill Farming under Agriculture would be given a level, not the category, as follows; Farming - Competant. That said, you should list a number of skills in such a way as is allowed by the guide, and is sufficiently justified by the character's backstory and age.

That's all for now. Bump the thread when you've made the edits and we can continue.[/dir]