20-03-2013, 07:51 PM
Alright Tig, after some discussion with staff, we have decided to deny this application due to events involving Allison and other problems we have had before. The majority of staff feels that perhaps you are not ready for another female character. So for now, June is denied. Now then about the application itself?
Well, I did not have too many problems with it as you included some brief mentions of various lore which helped the story move along, however my biggest flaw is one involving logic with the arrow in Junes shoulder. If she was shot, and several hours passed, then June would have died without proper medical attention.
Additionally, the shipwreck thing has become a cliche within itself by now. Several players have done it before and there is really no reason to have your character come by in a wreck rather than standard means.
Finally, the skills concern some of the other staffers and myself. While June has no skills that have large amount of effort and skill in them, she still has a large number of skills which concerns others in the sake of development.
That is it, and some advice, don't make a character based around a gender. Make a character with interesting ideas and thoughts, a personality and dignity, and a thought process that is entirely their own. Then decide gender last. I could very well have made Thomas female and named him something else, with the same story.
Thanks, FireDog
Well, I did not have too many problems with it as you included some brief mentions of various lore which helped the story move along, however my biggest flaw is one involving logic with the arrow in Junes shoulder. If she was shot, and several hours passed, then June would have died without proper medical attention.
Additionally, the shipwreck thing has become a cliche within itself by now. Several players have done it before and there is really no reason to have your character come by in a wreck rather than standard means.
Finally, the skills concern some of the other staffers and myself. While June has no skills that have large amount of effort and skill in them, she still has a large number of skills which concerns others in the sake of development.
That is it, and some advice, don't make a character based around a gender. Make a character with interesting ideas and thoughts, a personality and dignity, and a thought process that is entirely their own. Then decide gender last. I could very well have made Thomas female and named him something else, with the same story.
Thanks, FireDog