Hello again, thanks for including the lore bits, but we got a bit more to do, so let's dive in again.
1. The civil war is mesalians fighting other mesalians, not lucins purging.
I would reread the lore part if you could, I linked it last post.
2. Some of your skills in general need to be lowered, at mid twenties, advance skills aren't easy.
3. I would try to lower the amount of reliance on stealing, as it won't get you a lot of good RP on the server, although you can feel free to do so as long as you follow the rules.
I like the improvements you are making, so keep at it!
Hello once again, Generic, just a few more things I noticed after reading it again. Sorry about not seeing it all at once, but sometimes that is how this process goes.
1. Advanced skills at 24 are usually the only one they have, lacking anything else, since your character has other skills, you should bump it down competent.
2. I am confused at the siege, did his father stop working because of the siege? And what age did he start learning those skills of thievery/tailoring.
3. Also if you could include somewhere his appearance, it would be appreciated.
19-08-2013, 08:52 AM (This post was last modified: 19-08-2013, 08:53 AM by Generic_Bad_Guy.)
1. I have bumped it down as suggested
2. I put a foot knote on the matter. Also, he started to learn the basics of tailoring at 5-6 years, and thievery at 8-9 years. Obviously, due to his youth he could only do very simple tasks, but he slowly learnt the trades through repetition and watching his father.
3. I also completed the section on his appearance, with the completion of the skin, which was previously in the section of anything I'd like to add, which I have renamed accordingly.
Also, I've added a small set of lockpicks to what he's carrying. I hope the addition is alright, but if not, I will ofcourse remove it.
Have some bad news, we were having a discussion about your app, and decided that a thief character for a new player wasn't something we'd allow for now. If you want to change your back story to fit a different profession, maybe go further into the tailoring, or pick up a whole new concept if you would like. I'm sorry it came so late, but we've been busy with staff retiring that we haven't had time to discuss apps in groups. I really hope that doesn't detract you from taking the time to change it.
