[LuckyLeaf]

XD Alright, thanks Michelle!

[SentaiPink]

Hi young, sorry about this but Seven's gone back under review. There's a few inconsistencies that staff feels need worked out if you'd like to use this character at some point.

[LuckyLeaf]

Wow, long time. I'm fine with that, I'll be glad to fix any discrepancies that come up. I suppose Seven /is/ quite the conflicting character.

[SentaiPink]

Very sorry about that, no one gave it a glance after it was first accepted and when we did notice a problem it took us a while to find the time for it given its not an active character, you've got two already, nor is it immediately pressing. So these are what we've stumbled on:

1. One year-old survival scenario is unrealistic.
   I'm afraid that it at that age it just doesn't stand to reason any child would even know to fight for food, should they be malnourished at such an age, then Seven would of likely developed brain damage. I'd recommend raising this to an age with a little more cognitive development.
   
   
2. There is no mention of age when his training started
   Or when the group of kids finished being narrowing down. He certainly couldn't start training at one. In such early stages of life, just learning to walk and talk pretty much consume all of ones energy.
   
   
3. Skill list and their use in the backstory
   Novice> Apprentice> Competent> Adept> Expert> Master
   • 12 year-old being an excellent fighter while knowing nothing outside of training and a dungeon is a little unrealistic, this part of the story needs a bit of revision.
     
   • Overall skill levels are too high. This character is too young to have anything above adept (advanced) and even then, too many skills at that level are still overpowered. Please revise.
     
   • He learned 3 methods of fighting (Sword, Melee and Dagger) extremely well for a profession where he'd basically only ever use one. The dagger's likely to be used more often and thus more skill with. Yet has remarkable skills in all three.
     
   • In spite of Hollywood, it isn't really possible to easily break a neck, this needs better explanation.
   
   
   
4. The Master's reasoning is a little inconsistent
   While you do mention he might of overlooked that Seven is skilled with hand-to-hand, there are a number of other things we stumble on during this scene.
   • If the boy is Seven's age, why doesn't seven know him? If he's part of a later group, then if a hundred kids die every time a group is brought in how come no one notices if there's children dying by the droves?
     
   • If the boy hasn't gone through his trial yet/was younger, why was he pitted against a boy with 6 years of in-field experience?
     
   
   
5. Takes a long time to get to Forbidden Lands.
   At least a month to get anywhere near where Ravenna is, so that will need updated too.
   

Thank you for your understanding Young.

[LuckyLeaf]

Alright, loads of stuff that had gone unnoticed; a good thing they've been spotted. I'll find some time to work on it eventually.