08-06-2017, 02:11 PM
Alright, first I have to apologise for the last feedback. It seems soemthing went wrong and I gave you the wrong feedback. Doing this late at night clearly isn't a good idea.
Anyhow, onto your actual points to work on.
As the lore point goes, since your character is 19, I need to see reference to the lore points that occured while she was alive, namely the Civil War ending and the Dusk Portal reopening and how she and others reacted if they heard of these things happening.
Next, I would recommend that you take a look at previous accepted apps to see some examples of what we would prefer to see of you in the backstory. It doesn't need to be a novel, but it needs to be more detailed than what you have right now. Long story short, it needs to be a story that follows their life instead of a summary. Ideally it should follow the character's life closely, but doesn't need huge amounts of detail, and explain how they developed their skills to their appropriate levels and how their personality was formed.
Since that might be quite a big ask, I'll leave feedback there. Given progress here your application should be dealt with quickly. Like before, post when you've made your edits and we'll continue.
Anyhow, onto your actual points to work on.
As the lore point goes, since your character is 19, I need to see reference to the lore points that occured while she was alive, namely the Civil War ending and the Dusk Portal reopening and how she and others reacted if they heard of these things happening.
Next, I would recommend that you take a look at previous accepted apps to see some examples of what we would prefer to see of you in the backstory. It doesn't need to be a novel, but it needs to be more detailed than what you have right now. Long story short, it needs to be a story that follows their life instead of a summary. Ideally it should follow the character's life closely, but doesn't need huge amounts of detail, and explain how they developed their skills to their appropriate levels and how their personality was formed.
Since that might be quite a big ask, I'll leave feedback there. Given progress here your application should be dealt with quickly. Like before, post when you've made your edits and we'll continue.