08-05-2013, 10:43 AM
Updated ^^
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Michelle
Head Cheerleader, Homecoming Queen, Part-Time Model
Head Cheerleader, Homecoming Queen, Part-Time Model
08-05-2013, 02:32 PM
Excellent. This is the only point in my previous post which still applies to your application:
And lastly, I should tell you that mobs are IC in the Middle Realm; they're called dusk creatures, or dusk spawn, or any other variation involving 'dusk'. They're more or less considered a completely normal, but dangerous occurrence of the night. Because of this, it follows that your character should realistically have some kind of protective escort with her up until she arrives at the setting, unless you'd prefer her to enter the setting injured (which is fine). Please state your decision and revise your application accordingly.
That's all. Good luck.
Michelle Wrote:3. Your characterâs personality requires more detail overall. You have a good start, but your character could use a little more individuality, variety and complexity. Please consider these aspects of your character, and elaborate on them. Also, please note point 2d).Although the pieces you have written do flesh out your character more, her personality isn't completely explicit. Remember, the key is minimal gaps and unanswered questions. Please update your character's personality notes with more elaboration.
And lastly, I should tell you that mobs are IC in the Middle Realm; they're called dusk creatures, or dusk spawn, or any other variation involving 'dusk'. They're more or less considered a completely normal, but dangerous occurrence of the night. Because of this, it follows that your character should realistically have some kind of protective escort with her up until she arrives at the setting, unless you'd prefer her to enter the setting injured (which is fine). Please state your decision and revise your application accordingly.
That's all. Good luck.
![[Image: a88823d4-5335-49cc-91b4-f8c511e214f8_zps...1409225114]](http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g158/mnguy3/a88823d4-5335-49cc-91b4-f8c511e214f8_zpsf21a961a.png?t=1409225114)
Michelle
Head Cheerleader, Homecoming Queen, Part-Time Model
Head Cheerleader, Homecoming Queen, Part-Time Model
09-05-2013, 06:49 AM
One last thing.
They lost a few to the dusk creatures. Mostly deckhands and washboys who'd wandered off into the night to relieve themselves. But they kept following the beacons, until they mounted the final hill as the sun began to set.
It was her first time seeing a town this big.
This implies that your character will be arriving with some sort of NPC group rather than alone. I'm sorry if my last post confused you; your character must arrive to the setting (that is, the town) alone, but she may be escorted up until that point. You will have to think of a way for your character to be alone; perhaps the crew she was with weren't as interested in the forbidden lands as she was.
That's all. Good luck.
They lost a few to the dusk creatures. Mostly deckhands and washboys who'd wandered off into the night to relieve themselves. But they kept following the beacons, until they mounted the final hill as the sun began to set.
It was her first time seeing a town this big.
This implies that your character will be arriving with some sort of NPC group rather than alone. I'm sorry if my last post confused you; your character must arrive to the setting (that is, the town) alone, but she may be escorted up until that point. You will have to think of a way for your character to be alone; perhaps the crew she was with weren't as interested in the forbidden lands as she was.
That's all. Good luck.