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[Approved] Whitelist Application (revised 4 to 6 (lost count))
#1
Name- That_one_niceguy

How did i find- I have been looking for a good role play server to join since one of my friends talked about it, that was how i defined it to an RP style, then after using a white-list as another way to specify here I found Mesalia.

About- I am an average person, my roleplay experience is not so good but with my imagination hopefully this server will teach me quickly. out of character chat I would be called Niceguy but to those I trust they call me Drake. My hobbies are mainly swimming, to me being in a swim team is enough to take over a social life.

RP Name- Cadwgan Jernigan.

Age-19.

Gender- Male.

Appearance- Youthful in any aspect, several scars only on his chest and back portions. Skin is fairly tan due to many days out in the sun, average height for his age but his muscles set him apart being more intense but not too bulky.

Personality- He is shy only for the first few moments, he would rather stick back and watch everyone for their strengths and weaknesses then go into a conversation knowing how to act for certain people. He doesn't like mentioning his past too much because he fears the trust needed to tak about those things, has acute trust issues at times. If he is not in the town he is hunting or gathering, Cadwgan does not like to stay still for events like fishing or a town gathering or debate but will stay idle if the matter is important. If there is someone in need of help he will come to assist in any way he can, and if he cant he will back off and let others who can help more do what is needed.

Backstory- Cadwgan Jernigan, a 19 year old boy with an kind look but not a kind history. He was born in a cozy mountain village of unknown location before the village and his family burned to the ground in a raid by the Xitians in the final stretch of the Civil War.
        It was a calm day and a calm life in the mountains with his loving family, everyone knew one another it was close knit and everything you didn't have someone else had for equal trade, either that or it was a weeks trip to the nearest town away from the mountain and into territory of bandits who would rob you of everything and dusk creatures that would kill you mercilessly. He was raised by his father during the day while he patrolled the village and bordering areas, the little ways to snare a rabbit and to pick wild berries were one of his fondest memories with his father and once night came he was given to his mother to help with housework and cooking, without a doubt his last night in the town although was hazy from the confusion and fear of the event but forever will stay with him. His village was holding a festival to pray for the next crop to harvest would be healthy and bountiful, as they did annually, this year however the event would be cut short by a group of Xitian who came in the night when the spirits of mead had taken their hold of the patrolmen. After they made their assault there was only chaos, the bonfires and torches gave them power as they slaughtered the townsfolk and spread the fire to every hut and shack till they arrived at Cadwgan's house. His father fought so bravely but against a team of Xitian powered with fire that is spreading as far as the eye could see he was no match, he with his loving wife only ensured that their heir, Cadwgan Jernigan, last of the Jernigan bloodline, made it out as safe as luck would allow. They died unwavering in their love for Cadwgan as the boy ran through the game trails he memorized while on patrol with his father until he crossed into unknown grounds. He knows not if anyone else from his village made it out but he felt in his heart his parents watched over him from above, but no amount of help from them could have pulled away from the fact of his age, the boy made it as far as he could on his own but where he found safety from the Xitian was the territory of thieves and cutthroats. Days he evaded them but within a short time he was scarce on food and water, and in foreign land to him he didn't trust anything. Soon enough though after days of thirst and near starvation he found himself at the mercy of those skilled in death, as long as the coin is right.
        Taken in by a caravan of mercenaries he was enslaved to fill mugs of mead and loot the bodies of the fallen enemies in battle until he was of age to hold a sword he was valued even when he was that young for his strength and skills taught by his father, from tracking a lone target as he was taught with game to silent infiltration with ways to keep quiet also learned from his father. Lessons from his parents with enough effort always could have been molded to fit the needs of the tasks he was given as a child mercenary. Cadwgan started his training at 7 with brutal days of life-and-death lessons by many of the mercenaries known for their techniques to fight the bandits and dusk creatures for coin, Cadwgan learned well under their gaze and by the age of 9 he was slowly put into further battles. With real battle experience Cadwgan grew in knowledge and power and then, soon after, fame. By the time Cadwgan was 16 he gained respect within the ranks of his caravan but the chains, as he saw them, were still there.
     There was no rank system or badge of power within his caravan only respect and Cadwgan was second only to their boss who goes by the name Boris. He had his choice of the plunder, of fame, of women but nothing that he was interested in. What he craved was freedom, for the chains on his wrists and ankles to be broken off him and he can choose his own path, but the road to freedom was nothing if not denied by his boss. As the caravan traveled about all he was waiting for was an opportunity and it came with a simple assassination job. With the difficulty of the job an amount of mercenaries are dispatched to match the level, with this one that came over messenger pigeon only Cadwgan was needed, a low threat band of thieves and his target was the entire bunch of 12 to 14 but his separate plans we already in motion. With their tabard at his back he packed food for a week long trip and in a separate bag a quiver of arrows, his bow, axe, and trusted shield that had saved his life and had the splinters to prove it. Once he was out of sight the urge filled him up and within an instant he turned and sprinted off, he ignored their master trackers, their rule of "death to the deserter"  and rode like the devil was behind him to the one place he knew they simple wouldn't go, the Forbidden Land. 
     Cadwgan used any and all the lessons he learned from his mercenary comrades and those taught to him by his parents that he could remember. At 17 he took his freedom, although every flutter in the distance was possibly his old friends coming to kill him he never regretted his decision.
           2 years wandering he used his hunting and gathering skills learned by the mercenaries to live as a wandering swordsman in search of a place to sit and stay. And now he arrives from the boat on the shores of Nightveil with that search fresh in his heart.

Capabilities- since he was taken in at the age of 5 and released from his slavery at 16 (from the skills guide) he is a Competent Swordsman and with only 2 years wandering he can be counted as a novice gatherer and hunter (although he hunted game for food in his years as a mercenary).

Arrived with- a battle axe and pick (iron), 3 pieced of bread, and an iron chest plate.

Additional Information- I am mature enough to grasp various situations, I may not be on as often as some players (i do have team events to swim at), and if i like the server I will be good addition to the headcount.
#2
Hello, Niceguy. I'm Hutchy and I'll be helping you through whitelisting.

Alright, first things first, I need to see more relation to the servers lore, which can be found here.  Being 19, he'll have been born shortly before the Civil War ended. Make sure to make mention of these and following events in your character's backstory.

Speaking of backstory, it needs to end with either your character arriving in or travelling to where the setting takes place. For ease of reference, it's a town called Nightveil.

Skills-wise, I'm not sure where he's getting advanced swordsmanship from. What age was he allowed to use a sword from, because he needs at least 14 years of study to have an advanced skill. The backstory doesn't really back that up.

Finally, for items, rather than explain as I do, I'll throw a quote from application format thread your way:
'This is a listing of items your character arrives in the setting with. The list should be fairly short, only a few essentials if anything at all. Limiting what you have to start encourages RP later when your character is in the setting and looking for more of what they need or want.'


Sorry this took a little longer than we'd like. Please bump this thread when you're done making your edits and we'll continue from there.
#3
Alright, Guy, next round.

Backstory-wise, I'll need to know how he survived/escaped the razing of his village as it's something of a major event. That in mind, I also want to see you describe how this event, and later ones, helped him become the character he is. 

Also, his final mission. If this is such a huge event in his life, we need details. What happened, how did it go, did anything happen to him, etc. 

I noticed in his personality that you mentioned he could be mining. Without the necessary skill, he's not going to be doing a whole lot of that without injury or, worst case but very real scenario, of an early death. Unless you plan to add this as a skill, as well as the evidence in his backstory, I would remove this.

Finally, for items, this character's going to be moving into a town with goods and services readily available to him. In addition to spending months at sea to get there, it's very unlikely he'd have 15 edible pork chops to carry around, and 20 torches would likely be taking up too much valuable room. Bear in mind this and what I said earlier about a short list with just a few essentials.
As for the pick though, if you want, I recommend that rather than another sword wielding character, you might think about instead having a war pick for some variety and uniqueness to your character.
Earlier you had armour listed. This would be fine, but a light suit of perhaps chain or leather with some thin steel plates might work better over full steel plate. He's a mercenary afterall, and full steel plate armours are prohibitively expensive.

And with that, I give you the next round. Bump the thread when you're done, and we'll see where we go from there.
#4
I guess replying to my post "bumps" the post? either way here goes nothing.
#5
Sorry for the wait, Niceguy, but I'm here for your next round.

I'm afraid those stories told about him are going to have to change. A lot.

(05-09-2016, 06:11 PM)That_one_niceguy Wrote: a true vision of their homeland.
Long story short, no one is entirely sure what the Nether Realm looks like because it's entirely undocumented. 
(05-09-2016, 06:11 PM)That_one_niceguy Wrote: Fire and lava was everything
If this is true then the heat of the area would simply be too intense for him, perhaps even some of the Xitians, to enter. Also, neither race are capable of terraforming such a large area, even in groups.
(05-09-2016, 06:11 PM)That_one_niceguy Wrote: with an arrow sunk into his shoulder he was reminded. Adrenaline rushed through his veins
No amount of adrenaline is going to stop the pain response. The shoulder is one of the worst places to get shot since it's home to several nerve bundles, not to mention his collar bone and shoulder. If he's lucky, he's in crippling pain, if not he's just permanently lost the use of his arm and is bleeding out.
(05-09-2016, 06:11 PM)That_one_niceguy Wrote:  as tens of Xitian archers and swordsman revealed themselves
(05-09-2016, 06:11 PM)That_one_niceguy Wrote:  he did kill his opponents with a various array of twists and spins to allow fatal cuts and throwing knives to sail from his hands
'Tens' implying anything from 20 to 90 of them. Even if it were 10, he's not going to get past them alive. There's just too many, he's only 19 and inexperienced and right now we have to assume there's still some environmental advantage heavily in favour of the Xitians.
(05-09-2016, 06:11 PM)That_one_niceguy Wrote: Most of the wounds took weeks to heal back up
(05-09-2016, 06:11 PM)That_one_niceguy Wrote: the few lucky shots with arrows and daggers weakened him for months
Even if he were able to walk away from this, his wounds are described as being so significant that he's likely to have suffered massive internal bleeding, shattered bones, muscle torn to shreds, severing of nerves, organs damaged into uselessness to name a few. I don't care how tough someone is, getting 'dotted with arrows' of any variety is not something that heals over a few weeks and doesn't leave you crippled; and trust me, it most certainly won't have been 'a few lucky shots' that hit him.


Sorry for the long one, but seeing as this carries more weight now after your last edit, it needs to be done realistically. Personally, I;d recommend either writing a more achievable goal, or more simply writing around it. Right now I just can't accept this as is.

I'll leave it there for this round. Bump the thread when you've made your edits and we'll keep going.
  


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