[Good_Old_Epsilon]

Alright, I'm done, I addressed everything you said in your post.

- Reduced his skill levels and got rid of one, while pointing out where he learned them and how.
- Changed his backstory to avoid all of that Ambassador nonsense.
- Changed his fears and gave reason to them.
- Rephrased a few things and TRIED MY BEST to keep to a Past Tense.
- Changed his interests a little.
- Removed a Long Term Objective.
- Gave his Personality a reason and more of a description.
- Gave the Monastery a name.

Hopefully this should be enough.

If you find any more strange tense switching, point it out, and I will change it. Otherwise, I don't know what else to change here.

I blame my Nationality for this, I sometimes wished I was born English.

Then again food sucks major ass over here.

[Good_Old_Epsilon]

Hey Chelle, just replying on this post to notify you that it's done. Just awaiting your judgement now.

[SentaiPink]

Hi Eps! I'm going to help Michelle out here.

1) Lore issues -
You don't mention any of the major lore events, nothing about the civil wars or anything. I understand his upbringing was a peaceful one but surely he knew about the fighting or perhaps had a rude awakening once he left? either way, gotta get some sort of lore relation in there.

Annnnd that's it. I think you got everything else Michelle mentioned. Great work, I'm really looking forward to this character Eps!

[Good_Old_Epsilon]

Alrighty, thanks for working on this Pinkie!

- Added a part in the backstory to include the Civil War.
- Added a mention of other races in the backstory.

That should hopefully do it.

[SentaiPink]

It looks good to me, Eps. [Approved], BUT, yeah I know, the dreaded but...

The only thing remaining is his entrance. Please see this thread. I think you have already, but just making sure <3, PM or Skype me with any questions, and if any changes are needed I'll take a look again at the back story.